Thursday, August 9, 2012

Looking Back & Forward | a series of pictures & words

I tried to write this on Monday night but it was more important to find my happy in some Blue Bell Cherry Vanilla ice cream and conversation with my husband.

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{Owen sneaks into Garrett's room every chance he gets.}

I tried to write this Tuesday but all I wanted to do when I got home is hold Travis and after all the babies were in bed and all the chores were done I was exhausted and asleep before 10 PM.

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{Garrett was so excited to camp out in the living room.}

I tried to write Wednesday morning coffee in hand with 30 minutes to spare before work but that was only enough time to start.

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{All three boys with a few dogs thrown in.}

 
So today I write with some perspective instead of the raw emotion of the first day.

pause, long pause

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{We were all hanging out in Travis' room and the older boys were playing nicely.}

One thing has remained all week, I don't know which way is up.

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{By all counts this is a terrible picture, except it captures my boys and I see a glimpse of the future.}

The truth is staying at home with the boys is the hardest work I've ever done.
The truth is staying at home with the boys is the most rewarding work I've ever done.

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{Owen & my father in duet.}

The truth is going back to work is hard on my husband.
The truth is going back to work means lunch dates with him again.

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{Owen is all about positive feedback. He was clapping for himself here after his lovely song.}

The truth is I want the best life for my family and right now that means me contributing financially to our future.
The truth is our best life is always evolving.

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{Travis loves the blue octopus. He talks to him regularly.}

The truth is it was really nice to see a lot of friendly faces from the office.
The truth is being a mother that works outside the home is the most confusing, contradictory, difficult place for me to be.

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{Gathering Garrett's laundry I found this. When my husband told him we could buy him shorts with pockets Garrett told him "Why? I can make them."}

The truth is I will likely miss the first time Travis rolls over and a lot of other firsts.
The truth is my boys seem to thrive in their time away from home.

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{He looks so big. Is there a flash of a teenager?}

The truth is I am fortunate to have a good job that has respected my priorities.
The truth is I am good at my job and when I find myself deep into a task I enjoy it.

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{The love bomb.}

The truth is by having space away from my boys during the day my time with them at home is precious and I cherish it.
The truth is when I was at home with the boys my patience was tested and I didn't always cherish it as I should.

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{Our first breakfast out as a family of five.}

The truth is my husband grounds me.
The truth is I'm not the only one adjusting.

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{OH my, the chub.}

The truth is nothing makes my heart sing more than seeing my kids happy.
The truth is seeing their smiles at the end of the day is the best part of my day.

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{Garrett loved Lego camp. So cool.}

The truth is I don't have all the answers to the master plan.
The truth is I spend a lot of time trying to figure it out.

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{Soaking in the snuggles.}

The truth is envy is a theif of joy and it is no longer welcome in my life.
The truth is I am responsible for the energy I bring into my life.

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{Travis is finally showing signs of movement. It won't be long before he rolls over.}

The truth is tears come easy.
The truth is laughter is the best medicine.

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{I've loved seeing the light in my home throughout the day.}

The truth is I have a diverse group of mothers surrounding me.
The truth is the summer has shown me that we all have more in common that appears on the surface.

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{Hilarious. There are all sorts of "community" toys at the pool. He cracks me up.}

The truth is I strive to live an authentic life.
The truth is I miss my babies.

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{Mr. Mischief}

The truth is whether I'm home all day or not I love my boys like crazy.
The truth is whether I'm home all day or not they love me like crazy too.

And this my friends wraps up my reflections on maternity leave. If you would like to read the complete series you can find all posts here.

Monica

6 comments:

vintagemodernquilts | Lisa said...

I love this post. In fact, I've loved this entire series of posts. It's so you! These would be a lovely mini album. Someday... ;)

Marina D-K said...

Beautiful post. As a WOHM too I so get this. Thanks for sharing your truths in motherhood.

MariClaudi said...

Thank you for sharing and I whole heartily agree that all moms have more in common than they realize.

Sara said...

This was just beautiful and captures well the thoughts of just about every mom trying to do her best for her family. Many blessings to you as you navigate through this part of life. I have 3 boys and I'm still trying to figure out what normal is (and the youngest is 2!).

Deanna said...

so great! Love your boys!

Val said...

You said everything just right.....and I love the backwards baseball helmet