Saturday, February 28, 2009

LOAD 2/27


Journaling:

Have I told you that the night we brought you home I called the nursery because I thought I needed to take you back?

When we were leaving the hospital I bundled you up and put a cover on your car seat due to paranoia that you would be cold. In my defense it was the middle of winter in Kentucky and you were just a few days old. I instructed Grandma & Grandpa to keep the house warm for your arrival.

We walked into a toasty house and you started screaming. We thought you might be hot so we stripped you down. You kept screaming. I thought you were hungry so I tried to nurse you. You refused to eat; I started to panic.

We didn’t know what to do so I told your Daddy to call the hospital and I said to the nurse “I think I need to bring him back I don’t know what to do.” I wonder if they get a lot of those
calls because she didn’t seem very surprised.

Turns out you were screaming because you were trying to go potty. It wasn’t anything I was doing or not doing.

Four years later I still think of our first night together often.
The memory seems to surface when I question whether or
not I know what I’m doing. It helps me remember to trust
that we’ll work it out.


Sorry the scan is a little funny. It felt so good to get this story down. This picture was already scrapped preLOM but even though I scrapped the picture I did not tell my story. Yet another reason I adore my system.

lovemon

3 comments:

StudioB said...

"even though I scrapped the picture I did not tell my story"

To me, that's what LOM is all about. Tell the story. Not just pretty pictures, papers and embellishments.
Picture + story = scrapbooking. All the pretty things are just fun bonuses.
TracyBzz

Fun Mama - Deanna said...

I love this story! It's so hard sometimes to have confidence in ourselves. I'm glad you got this story scrapbooked. This will be good for Garrett (and his wife) to know someday.

Love your new banner too.

Jana said...

I love your layout. It's beautiful.
I remember the insecure feelings in bringing my oldest home. I didn't know what I was doing. I tried to breast feed, but between the two of us, and the lack of sleep, I was sure that I was not doing something right. I didn't even have a house plant before she was born. Thanks for reminding me to get this memory down.