Tuesday, June 8, 2010

A Full Heart

I have a post in draft about Owen's entrance into the world & posts swimming around in my head about how we are adjusting to being a family of four but as I rocked Owen to sleep for his midday nap all I could think of as I held him tight was how full my heart is right now.

My focus these days is purely on my boys. Every emotion that runs across me begins with them. It's not uncommon for me to find myself with tears on face. Tears of joy, of love, of pain, of joy.

After 5 and a half years of pouring all of myself into Garrett my heart breaks when I can't give him the attention he is familiar with. Then I see the joy in his face & I am hopeful that I am doing something right to comfort him in this time of transition.


When I gaze into Owen's little face, which I do alot of these days, my heart breaks that he will never get my undivided attention. It's then I savor our middle of the night feedings when it is just the two of us & he slips me a secret smile. I'll trade all the sleep in the world for these stolen moments.


Waiting out a heavy sprinkle shower at the park Garrett takes a picture with his brother. The first picture of brothers. My heart is full.


When I rocked Owen to sleep today I squeezed him tight when my heart rejoiced that the child the Lord meant for us to have is here in my arms.


My heart is full.

lovemon

6 comments:

Jenny Garland said...

Awww, I love you, Monica! You're so sweet and your boys are so lucky to have a wonderful mama :) I can't wait to meet Owen (and Garrett too).

The Bethancourts said...

Aw, Monica! i'm so excited for your new family. Owen is a doll! I have enjoyed reading your blogs and could definitely relate to some of your emotions. I hope y'all are doing well. miss you :) PS- luv the braided pillow! SO cute! how do you attach all the braids together?

Sue Althouse said...

What a precious time for you! Your post and pictures brought tears to my eyes. The happiness sure comes through.

Melanie said...

So beautiful! Congrats to you and your family!

Christina Reid said...

Congratulations on the arrival of baby Owen! I just got home from a business trip, and my hubby Kevin said that he just popped by your blog and saw that you had the baby. So happy for you and your family!

Gina said...

Owen is GORGEOUS! Congrats to all of you! I'm thrilled for you. Cherish every moment. And remember God didn't intend for Owen to get your undivided attention or he would be an only child without a father ;). He is exactly what God wants him to be - a little brother and son to two absolutely FANTASTIC parents! Relish how perfectly God is working out His plan for this little man. How special. What a gift.
Blessings!
"For I know the plans for you delcares the Lord, plans to give you hope and a future."
P.S. I cried everyday for the first 6 months after God blessed us with David - I can totally relate ;)!