Wednesday, May 12, 2010


All I have known for the last 5 1/2 years is how to be a mother of one. In about 3 weeks everything will change.

This little guy has given me more joy in his short lifetime that I ever imagined possible. I was prepared for , and take very seriously, the impact we as mother's have on our children's lives. How who we are & how we approach this role will shape their lives.

What I wasn't prepared for was how much he would shape my life. I didn't know how he would change me.

Because of him I've learned
  • to be more patient
  • to be silly
  • to let go of anger
  • to accept love in all different ways
  • to put others first
  • to do what you love
  • to ignore insecurities
  • to find joy in the tiniest things
  • to use kind words
  • to take time for yourself
  • to set boundaries
  • to nurture

He makes me a better person.

The last few weeks it's been at the forefront of my thoughts how almost everything I know about motherhood is going to get turned upside down in a few short weeks. That scares me a little bit.

Owen's arrival will change Garrett. That goes without saying.

The trickier part is that how Mitch & I navigate through this will shape both of their lives. The impact of our choices will set the tone for their relationship.

When you think about, really think about, what we are tasked with as parents, it is truly daunting.

Yesterday I was able to have lunch with my best friend, my husband. While we enjoyed delicious hamburgers & cheese fries we shared our concerns & came up with a navigation plan for this unknown territory.

I am beyond lucky to have such an engaged partner in life. His influence on Garrett is just as strong as mine. With my whole heart I know that Garrett is such a happy boy because of our equal yet different impact.

For the last 5 1/2 years I have seen what an amazing father he is. Because of this I breathe a sigh of relief that no matter the challenges that face us in the next few months, as a family we will come out stronger than ever once we get our feet under us.

It's faith in the Lord, faith in my husband, faith in the resilence of Garrett, faith in my motherly instinct, faith in love that allows me to be over the moon that in a few short weeks everything is going to change with Owen's arrival.

My faith allows me to look fear in the face & say I don't care.

This child is joining our lives on the Lord's timetable, not the one we had set out for us. While the journey wasn't always easy I believe that all the stops along the way have prepared our hearts for this new chapter.

And for me, in my journey of motherhood, all I need to have prepared is my heart.



Anonymous said...

Beautifully said. I love that you are so grounded in the things that matter. We can't prepare for everything, but we can set our expectations so that our reactions won't be completely out in left field. You are a great mom and I am blessed as I watch you go through new adventures. Your outlook is inspiring!!

Melanie said...

What a beautiful post! You are going to do just fine!